No fussiness at all - well, no peanut butter, but that's because it's rank, and I can't see it being served at a swanky do like yours, Karen...

As for being outnumbered by women, well - where do I sign up? ;-)

I'll wait ;¬)

You're not a blogger, Mr D. You're a commenter. Unless you have started a blog and not told us about it.

I keep forgetting you've never met Kate. She's really nice and friendly and funny, and she understands irony and actually manages to use it properly. Plus she has nice legs...

I hope the poor brow-beaten american readers, who were so offended by the anti-americanism in the comments on the banned books post, note that they are over-represented on this list.

And that Lyle can remain polite to them...

Thank you, dear. I will suppress my first thoughts ( ah, a pity party )and enjoy myself fully.

I shall be the one who smiles pleasantly and says nothing.

If only I was nice enough to hold a pity party.

Oh, don't worry, Karen, I can be nice to Americans - it's only the deep south fundamentalist book-burners I have a problem with. Besides, it'd only lead to heated conversation. And possibly some excellent rosebushes, if there were bookburner corpses to bury by the end of the evening...

I'd say some of my best friends are Americans, but, um, they're not. Ah well.

I can be nice to Americans.

Did Karen mention that I spend every summer visiting my family in Alabama ?

Oh I know, we'll make it a barbecue!

Oh. Has D finally convinced you ? Am I to be the entrée?

Yes, and I was hoping you could bring a few copies of James & The Giant Peach that we could use as fuel.

Evil book.

it's a shame i've just converted to southern fundamentalist book-burnism. lyle and i shan't get on, i'm afraid. other than that, lovely idea and i'm flattered to be invited!

and D is saying quite nice things about me, which leads me to believe he's got some kind of evil ulterior motive, because i'm pretty sure we hadn't arranged payment for this batch of compliments...

I tend to assume that D has some kind of evil ulterior motive, whatever the nature of the things he happens to be saying at the time. He's just that sort of person.

No, no, I'm not being evil, I really did enjoy the pleasure of Kate's company, and her legs, and of course her Mark. All four of them are welcome anytime.

for a scrabble rematch, perhaps?

Mmmm... only just got the invite. Honoured. May I look through your poetry collection while I'm there?

Diet - pie good. Pumpkin pie better. Pecan pie best. Pork pie at a pinch.

Don't you reckon the girls will end up in the kitchen and the boys in the pub?

At last I met a pretty girl, she laughed and talked with me, we both walked out of the kitchen and danced in a new way.

And now I've done my time in the kitchen at parties.

Sounds great! And we could play mah jong afterwards, very civilised. I'll be waiting for my invitation.
Diet: soup, of course.

Mah Jong would be cool. There aren't many in my social "circle" (well OK, square would be more descriptive) who play it. Dominos seems to be more their style...

And OK, in face of hostility, I'll declare a moratorium on the anti-Americanism. Promise. Pax Fuckwitana?