The Moses Conjecture

On holiday, we visited the Eceni reconstructed Celtic village, based on elements of archeological sites around Norfolk. It’s all voluntary, so piece by piece they are building up a settlement, with a few houses, a temple, a bakehouse and a pub. We were shown around by a guide, whose enthusiasm and imagination were inspiring and contagious; Bernard interrupted her explanations with many remarks and reinterpretations, giving us some insight of what he must be like at school.

He had a go at grinding corn into flower, felt the weight of a shield and a sword, and speculated about where people cooked their tea when they had no cookers. He was even allowed to stand on a rampart and fling pointy sticks over the fence, which was pretty terrifying.

The guide did say that it was impossible to know how people with no written tradition would have lived, when all they have to go on is what they find in the ground: post holes and bits of broken pot. So I was very interested by her reconstruction of a wicker moses basket. Remember this is conjecture [1] about a culture from more than 2,000 years ago. That’s where the baby would sleep, she said.

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  1. I do really like this word, but also I’ve just finished reading Fermat’s Last Theorem, and there was a lot of conjecturing in that. []
Posted in boob, erzsebel du jour | 2 Comments

Things you do not want People to say to your child

It’s society’s fault, innit, Lori muttered. Tell me about it. From the early weeks of my child’s life, People have been trying to condition him. Here are a few of the ways:

  • They’ll all be fighting over her, won’t they? One girl and seven boys in our antenatal group.
  • You can’t dress him in pastels! I most certainly can; he’s three weeks old.
  • Here is my gift. It is a pack of bibs that all say “trouble” and “naughty boy” and “scamp” on them.
  • School is boring, isn’t it? Seriously, why would an adult say that to a curious, bright, enthusiastic child?
  • Who’s your best friend? All groups split into factions. Make sure you pick the right one, kid.
  • Eat it all up like a good boy and then you can have some pudding. Plenty of research supports my decision to allow him to control his own appetite, and not learn that pudding is a reward. It’s a good theory, anyhow.
  • Be a good boy so Father Christmas brings you lots of presents. Don’t get me started.
  • Train sets are for babies. Have this toy gun instead.
  • You don’t need to be breastfeeding anymore! circa 12 months old
  • Ugh, nasty broccoli!
  • Eek, a spider/bee/mouse! I tried so very hard not to pass my phobias on to him. It really sucks to have had this completely undermined by a childminder.
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Point Blank

Mum, are there white birds?

You mean like swans?

No. Swans and gooses are just ducks. They are not birds.

Yes, they are birds. Owls are birds too.

No. Owls are not birds. Birds can only come out in the day, and owls come out at night.

What are they, then?

Swans and gooses are ducks, and owls are not birds.

But we looked at the Observer Book of British Birds, and it had swans and geese and owls in it. So they must be birds.

No. That book is wrong.

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The lowest priority

My son was born almost five years ago at the time of writing, and I found breastfeeding very, very hard indeed. At that time, the nearest support groups were in nearby towns, and the thought of having to get myself together and drive in either direction was just too much. I was really lucky to have a supportive partner and a friend with a baby the same age, who kept me going through the first few months. She and I often thought it would be nice to have a supportive group in our own town, where we could just drop in to talk about our latest issues, whether they be sleep or weight or crying (the babies as well as us). In fact, if there had been such a group, we would probably have learned from the other mums and babies there, that what we thought were issues were actually normal phases that we and our babies were going through.

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Why Butterfly?

I had to run for the bus. It arrived seconds after I got to the bus stop, and took no time at all to get into Earley. No time to get nervous, except that the tattoo parlour was still closed, the roller-shutters halfway down the door. I bought a cup of tea from a cafe across the road, and loitered outside until they let me in.

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Posted in erzsebel du jour | 4 Comments