Rise v4 » blogging http://www.uborka.nu/rise Raising Bernard Thu, 10 Nov 2011 15:36:17 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Separate Streams http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2011/06/separate-streams/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2011/06/separate-streams/#comments Fri, 10 Jun 2011 21:00:33 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/?p=1366 Continue reading →]]> It’s a very, very long time since I’ve been near a chatroom. At the beginning, I had a new identity every day. It was so much fun being someone else, and harmless too, because all I was doing was, literally, chatting. I never expected to form any relationships. I didn’t grasp the potential of this internet thing at all.

It’s been over ten years now, and this internet thing completely changed my life, as those few remaining Rise readers who remember this place in 2003 will know. I was chatting before I was blogging. Then I was blogging, mostly about car boot sales and newly acquired html skills.[1] At that point, it was mostly Real Life people who knew about my blog,[2] and I didn’t have a clue that it could ever be any other way. I remember a blog[3] about some students who lived across the world from each other, and had fallen in love, and opened a paypal account for people to stump up for their airfares to visit each other. That was the first time I heard of paypal. I don’t think it turned out very well in the end.

Some of the people who I count amongst my favourite Actual People Who I Know, were bloggers from my first couple of years of blogging: Hydragenic and Turquoise immediately spring to mind. During the whole year-in-hungary debacle, my circle of blog friends grew (and came to be known as the ghouls as everything collapsed around me). My ex blamed ‘people in chatrooms’ for our relationship’s demise, and it was much more complex than that[4]; but the fact that I had a group of friends that did not include him was very hard for him to understand. They helped to keep me sane.

The chatrooms dropped right off as the blog circle got stronger; and by the time I came back to England, alone, I had broken that habit. I felt very much part of what we were then referring to as The Blogosphere, along with a whole raft of others, including the mysterious petedotnu, who I met in a comments box belonging to the aforementioned Hydragenic, or Mr Hg, as we like to call him. Mr Hg invited me to London to a blogmeet, I met oodles of lovely bloggers, most of whom I’m still in touch with, and looked up into the eyes of a very tall man who introduced himself as Pete…. petedotnu.

Pete and I spent the next three years socialising like mad with other bloggers. I’m not going to name anyone else because the chances are I’ll miss someone out and offend them. As I’m writing, I’m remembering all sorts of madness, online and off, mostly around the theme of cocktails (and cocktail sausages). When I moved in with Pete, I left the majority of my old ‘real’ life completely behind. I’m not in touch with anyone from school, university, or anywhere I’ve worked before moving here. In retrospect it feels like it was the biggest party of my life.

On becoming pregnant, I started noticing that some people also blogged about parenthood. Who knew? It had gone completely under my radar until that point. The focus of my circle shifted a bit, but a core of friends remained. Most of those are friends I’ve made through blogging but also met in real life, and chatted with on some sort of instant messenger, and now tweet at.

But the other thing that happened when I was pregnant, and more so once I became a parent, was that I met Real Life people too. Other couples on the antenatal course, mums at the baby clinic, NCT branch committee, people who shared a childminder with me, friends of friends of real life friends, students in my breastfeeding counselling tutorial group, more NCT volunteers, qualified breastfeeding counsellors and antenatal teachers, upwards of 20 parents-to-be per week in antenatal classes, mums at the drop-in groups, parents in the playground, and so on. Real People. Who know me. And if any of those people were to write a paragraph describing me, I don’t think anyone in the blog circle would recognise it.

Last year Pete, Bernard and I went for a pizza in Zizzi’s in December. Four other tables had people I had met in antenatal classes or at the drop-in. I feel more observed offline than on, because this is Karen as a Grown Up, and it Matters. Online friends are my family, I can relax and be silly and serve imaginary cocktails. Try explaining that to someone in the branch fundraising team, while we’re planning whether to use sponsor forms or justgiving.com for the sponsored toddle in August.

This is one of the several reasons why I stopped using facebook, which was cluttered with people who know me for real. I find it too easy to drop my guard and behave like erzsebel when I should be being Karen.

  1. there was a marquee tag I was rather pleased with [↩]
  2. the umbrella stand [↩]
  3. damn the pacific [↩]
  4. after all, he broke my arm [↩]
]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2011/06/separate-streams/feed/ 1 Things to do before you’re 40 http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2010/11/things-to-do-before-youre-40/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2010/11/things-to-do-before-youre-40/#comments Sun, 28 Nov 2010 17:19:03 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/?p=1268 Continue reading →]]> I scoff at those aspirational lists. Especially ones that include things like get in shape. I have never driven on Route 66 or been on safari or swum with dolphins, but I’m okay with that, actually (and the fact that I haven’t got a tattoo is not through lack of trying!)

If I sat and tried to write such a list, I’m not sure it would improve the quality of my life much. I am smugly happy and don’t feel any need to set aspiratonal goals. But if I had written such a list ten years ago, I wonder how many of the following things would have been on it:

  • Lived out of a suitcase
  • Learned who my real friends are
  • Heard my vocational calling
  • Worn a corset
  • Taken an overnight train from Prague to Venice
  • Owned a fast red car
  • Found my one true love
  • Done market research at a jazz festival
  • Written a novel
  • Turned a sock heel
  • Walked through London during a terrorist attack
  • Swum in the sea on Christmas Day
  • Crossed Salisbury Plain in a thunderstorm
  • Stood on a balcony at Stormont
  • Become a mother
  • Cried on the beach at the end of Grasmere Lake
  • Drunk champagne in the Izmir Hilton
  • Kissed in a Swindon hotel car park in the snow.

I only have a few hours left, so I doubt this list is going to get much longer.

]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2010/11/things-to-do-before-youre-40/feed/ 4 Drums in the Deep http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2010/08/drums-in-the-deep/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2010/08/drums-in-the-deep/#comments Sun, 22 Aug 2010 13:25:28 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/?p=1208 Continue reading →]]> On our first night, we arrived at a campsite to find half of it cordoned off for the Derbyshire Pagans’ Lammas celebrations. In the early evening when the drumming started and they lighted the lanterns, we stood in the circle until we got too cold. The well-prepared pagans had their long velvet cloaks and colourful ponchos, as well as every single one of them having a drum to beat.

The ritual started with welcoming the spirits of North, East, South and West, and then various other symbolic goings-on to do with fire and bread and so on, which I cannot google from my Christian workplace, but of course represented the things that are at the heart of every community: food, warmth, and each other. I feel that some faiths are better than others at admitting that this is what it’s all about: making certain of one’s basic needs, so that higher needs can follow. It’s basic Maslow, really. Or Maslow is basic religion.

I liked being in the circle, and would have loved to have a drum. Bernard stood beside me asking questions, and Pete stood apart, observing with his cynical eye. He says it’s all very well, but what’s all this welcoming the spirits nonsense? I say that probably very few people in the circle were actually welcoming the spirits in a hello spirit how are you kind of way, just as I guess there are a number of Christians who don’t actually believe they are eating the body of Christ when they take communion. I could be wrong on both counts, but anyway, that’s where I’m standing.

For me it was about a community celebrating what was good and expressing their hope for the good stuff to continue. The use of ritual and symbolism enables them to express a collective feeling without it all disintegrating into a rabble; or, like me, being so eclectic and uninformed that I never take a moment to stop and reflect on what’s good or what I hope for. Which is kind of where I was going when I started writing about lying in a tent being rained on.

I can quite easily relate to what the pagans do, not least because the term ‘pagan’ covers such an eclectic mish-mash of belief systems: wicked witches at one end and eco-activists at the other, and at the same time, not all of those are pagan, and not all pagans are those. I reckon I could apply the label to myself without ever donning a long velvet cloak or banging a drum. I don’t have to meditate in the garden at midnight on the solstice, to admit that quiet slow moments of peace are more likely to occur for me in conjunction with baaing and birdsong, than with the clack of computer keyboards and the buzz-whir of machines, and that those rare moments are spiritual for me.

I like the Wheel of the Year: the importance of the changing seasons, and respect for the earth. I get a tiny blast of this every time I go over to the allotment and come back with a bowl of beetroot or beans or ruby-red new potatoes. Admittedly not so much when an angle-legged spider runs across the carpet. I want to be able to mark the passage of time without it having to have a christian context like Easter or Christmas.

Sometimes I would like to belong to a group where my individual role is not important: wife, mother, breastfeeding counsellor, volunteer, secretary. That group of pagans banged their drums late into the night, and if one individual took a break, others carried on, so there was never a noticeable gap. The whole community drummed on.

]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2010/08/drums-in-the-deep/feed/ 1 Breastfed babies only healthier because their mums are so obedient, says Times http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/07/breastfed-babies-only-healthier-because-their-mums-are-so-obedient-says-times/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/07/breastfed-babies-only-healthier-because-their-mums-are-so-obedient-says-times/#comments Mon, 20 Jul 2009 10:48:14 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/?p=1114 Continue reading →]]> Benefits of breastfeeding ‘being oversold by the NHS” – Times Online.

For evidence of how deeply flawed this article is:

mothers who breastfed had a different outlook from those who did not and were more likely to follow advice on all health issues.

What, like the advice to give artificial milk as the panacea of all ills? The insistence on having your baby weighed every week? The suggestion that night-waking at 4 months means your baby is ready for solids? I’m sure there is probably some evidence out there showing that mums who have less exposure to health professionals are more likely to breastfeed for longer. Or even the other way round.

]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/07/breastfed-babies-only-healthier-because-their-mums-are-so-obedient-says-times/feed/ 0 Band, The. http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/05/band-the/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/05/band-the/#comments Wed, 20 May 2009 18:00:44 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/?p=1066 Continue reading →]]> This is a companion piece to a similarly-themed article on Pete’s site which, all things being equal, should be published at roughly the same time.

  1. Caledonia Mission from Music From Big Pink – Starts all jangly blues, immediately slows right down and becomes tuneful and pretty. Nice piano stuff going on. A song the way they used to make ‘em.

  2. Up On Cripple Creek from The Band – More guitary bits than the last one; this is the one that has been sticking in my head all week – that catchy chorus and the fact that it reminds me of the similarly-named Neil Young song, but is so much less whiney.

  3. Whispering Pines from The Band – Talking of whiney, this one has rather more of a Neil Young vibe about it. Is this not the same tune as Jealous Guy?

  4. W. S. Walcott Medicine Show from Stage Fright – This one makes my feet dance. When I have drifted into not-listening-to-the-background-music, this one brings me back.

  5. Chest Fever from Music From Big Pink – Weird organ music at the beginning makes you think they’re about to launch into Toccata. But they never do. Instead, the opening bars of Tunnel of Love by Bruce Springsteen then form the main tune of the song.

  6. King Harvest from The Band – Another song that grabs my attention, reminds me of various other artists who were presumably heavily influenced by Robbie Robertson, and makes me tap my feet.

  7. It Makes No Difference from Southern Cross – See above. Perhaps that makes these songs ‘classics’ – the feeling that I have heard them all many times before, when in fact I don’t think I have. This is all very much the dad-music kind of stuff, but funnily enough, not something I remember anything about from my teenhood. This one’s clearly a Tom Petty influence.

  8. The Shape I’m In from Stage Fright – See above.

  9. Don’t Do It from The Last Waltz – I think Pete is going to write about how he likes this list, but finds it hard to write about the songs. I am experiencing the same thing. All of these are very listenable, and vastly better than most of the rubbish we’ve had to write about. Apparently we only get wordy when we have something negative to say. And that’s just sad.

  10. All La Glory from Stage Fright – Sweet. See all above remarks. Plus Bob Dylan.

]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/05/band-the/feed/ 1 A week with The King http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/01/a-week-with-the-king/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/01/a-week-with-the-king/#comments Wed, 28 Jan 2009 19:00:26 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/?p=956 Continue reading →]]> This is a companion piece to a similarly-themed article on Pete’s site which, all things being equal, should be published at roughly the same time.

A few short steps away from last week’s Memphis playlist, this week we were listening to Elvis. It was mostly not awful.

Lawdy Miss Clawdy from Elvis Presley: Having said that, i didn’t like this much.

Mystery Train from Elvis At Sun: The thing I like most about this is the percussion.

Long Black Limousine from From Elvis In Memphis: A bit of a dirge. Heh.

His Latest Flame from No1s: Why is this song so familiar? For some reason I feel that it featured a lot in certain of my teenage years. I don’t know anyone called Marie, and I dislike the song; but I cannot recall the precise reason that I know it so well.

Tomorrow Is A Long Time from Tomorrow Is A Long Time: With its delicate guitar sound and simple beauty, this is the hit of the playlist. This song makes me understand why they called him The Voice. While listening, I feel it is the most romantic song in the world, and yearn to be dancing in the arms of the man I love. I am waiting for the original Bob Dylan version to be provided, for research purposes.

Good Rocking Tonight from Elvis At Sun: Sounds as though the commercial call of the dancefloors has been heard by this point. I bet he really did have a pair of Rockin Shoes.

I’m Leavin’ from Burning Love: Lovely melody and sliding vocals; this one will stay on the iPod.

In The Ghetto from From Elvis In Memphis: A dull tale of woe.

Heartbreak Hotel from No1s: My initial thought was “blah blah,” but then I actually listened, and the vocals on this song are FAB, and the instruments not overdone. I think I would like to hear this song covered by Pete’s band.

One Night from No1s: Puts me in mind of a sleazy old man giving the come-on to some girl who doesn’t know any better. I object strongly to the notion that for Elvis, one night with said girl would make all his dreams come true. I feel that most girls would find the offer of a single night less than romantic; not that were all looking for a great big commitment, but what about her dreams? Obv. it’s the 1960s and this is Elvis Presley offering to spend one wonderful night with her, so perhaps in fact that would be a dream come true for thousands of girls. It just seems kind of arrogant.

]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/01/a-week-with-the-king/feed/ 3 Links for Jan 28 http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/01/links-for-jan-28-2/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/01/links-for-jan-28-2/#comments Wed, 28 Jan 2009 08:05:26 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2009/01/links-for-jan-28-2/ Continue reading →]]>

How to Knit Fair Isle Patterns

I have done a simplest-ever fair isle pattern. Now I want something only slightly less simple.

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DishclothIndex

Lace stitches for knitted dishcloths.

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one-of-those-women: John Lewis, Avent and Code

Can John Lewis comply with the WHO code, while inviting Avent into its stores to promote their wares?

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Unclutterer » Archive » Book review: Career Renegade

there are only two kinds of jobs that are not clutter: 1. A career that you love with a deep passion, surrounded by great colleagues who support and believe in a similar vision, and that is an integral part and reflection of who you are 2. A job that has regular hours, no demands on your time beyond your scheduled work day, generates enough income for a comfortable lifestyle, great colleagues, and a positive corporate culture

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YouTube – Dad’s nose. Mum’s eyes. Gordon Brown’s debt.

The new campaign video from the Conservatives contributes to the normalisation of bottle-feeding in British culture. Way to consider the future health of the nation.

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correspondence with David Cameron’s office regarding THAT video

“Inappropriate bottle feeding – regardless of what’s in the bottle – kills 4000 babies every day. That’s why there is an international standard on the marketing of bottles and teats. This is the issue I raised, and the issue I would like an answer on please. I am not writing about breastfeeding, and I don’t need any response about breastfeeding. I would like an answer on the use of bottles in this video, and why the Conservative Party feels it’s okay to ignore the global impact of bottle use in your video?”

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BBC NEWS | England | Knitted breasts help mothers

Yay! I have three of these. They make people laugh. I don’t have a puppet, though.

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Breastfeeding: radical, feminist and good for you – The F-Word

Kate Joester explains how breastfeeding helped her understand ‘the personal is political’

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Discovering reflective practice

various models of reflective practice

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ysolda » Free Patterns

ysolda – Just another WordPress weblog

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Oliver James:Why isn’t there more research into parenting regimes for infants? | Life and style | The Guardian

Why isn’t there more research into parenting regimes for infants?

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Tubby teens born to be fat | The Sun |Woman|Health

Hart also says mums should try to breastfeed because it gives babies better appetite control throughout their childhoods. If breastfeeding, women should eat plenty of fruit and veg. Tastes come through in the milk so your baby will get used to healthy ones.

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Kids Craft Weekly – Issue 43 – Christmas cards

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FT.com / Comment / Analysis – Source of concern

“Cutting and running from a supplier is not the action of an ethical company,” the campaign said. “Ultimately this kind of action only punishes workers.”

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Social Marketing Institute – Success Stories – National WIC Breastfeeding Promotion Project

BF promotion targeting people who support/influence breastfeeding mothers

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Why can’t we latch on? | Life and style | The Guardian

on BF promotion, for an essay

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Revealed: Amazon staff punished for being ill – Times Online

Amazon ticks just about every box in the checklist for abuses of workers’ rights. Surprised they don’t chain them to the warehouse floor. NB. For the outraged commenters saying that this shouldn’t happen in the UK: it’s a daily occurrence in parts of the world where your everyday quota of tat is produced.

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Christmas cracker – Wikipedia

Invented in 1847 as a means to sell more sweets.

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]]> http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2008/12/links-for-dec-14/feed/ 0 Links for Dec 10 http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2008/12/links-for-dec-10/ http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2008/12/links-for-dec-10/#comments Thu, 11 Dec 2008 08:02:46 +0000 Karen http://www.uborka.nu/rise/2008/12/links-for-dec-10/

thelongthread.com · Thrifted Holiday Trees

christmas trees made out of felted jumpers

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EH.Net Encyclopedia: Advertising Bans, US

very long, but the top bit is useful

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UNICEF UK’s Baby Friendly Initiative welcomes Government announcement to invest £2m to help more women breastfeed :: Baby Friendly News

UNICEF’ UKs Baby Friendly Initiative (BFI) was delighted to hear Public health Minister Dawn Primorolo’s announcement yesterday committing the UK Government to invest an extra £2 million to help more women in England breastfeed.

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UK Baby Milk Law

Government spending on breastfeeding support is a mere £130,000 compared to the spending by the baby milk industry of £5m to 12m per year to persuade mothers to bottlefeed.

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Channel 4 – News – Formula milk labels warning

no help at all but interesting

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formula advertising – rant – babyworld -

argument contradicts itself but may be of some use

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COMMERCIAL PRODUCTION OF ARTIFICIAL BABY MILK

love the health warnings.

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Milk Flow: It’s at the Heart of Breastfeeding

Interesting article on managing problems with fast or slow milk flow.

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What do Humanists do at Christmas?

Article about Humanism and Christian festivals

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