We then drove up through Keswick to Penrith, which was utterly crap. I'm sorry if you live in Penrith and are offended by this, but your town sucks, and your music shop needs a better range of bass guitars. The only thing I will say in Penrith's favour is that I did get a cheap pair of trainers from a shop.

We checked into our B&B halfway between Penrith and Ullswater, then went for a walk. The nearest village was Dacre, and was only 15 minutes away. We decided that it would be sufficient as a venue for watching football. We then walked to Pooley Bridge, where I took photographs of Karen climbing on the rocks, hoping that I would manage to snap her at the exact moment when she became familiar with Ullswater on a more personal basis. Alas, her coordination was up to the job.